I saw this quote today and it spoke to me. Right now, I’m struggling in believing in rather or not it’s going to get better for me…so this self doubt is creeping in and it’s not going away. Also, my depression is super high…I’m stressed about $$$ and I’m tired of this stress. Ever since I’ve moved to this town (so four years ago) money has been issue for me. I’m doing what I love but I’m not getting paid well. In the last 3 months I have had to pay $2700 to keep my car going and it’s $2700 I don’t have. So why then did I get my car fixed?? Well, my job is 90 miles one way so I need the car for the job. And this $2700 is added to the couple thousand that I all ready had on my credit card…and so this SUCKS!!
I know what I focus my thoughts on is key right now…if I focus on the negative, I’m going to be in a terrible head space…so I gotta get out of this negativity.
The following quote I had saved in my sticky notes and I hadn’t looked at in awhile…and it’s helped me a tiny bit:
“I will have to look my son in the eye and admit to him that yes, there was a time in my history when I was pretty convinced that I didn’t want to be around anymore.
I will hate telling him that.
But I also can’t wait to tell him how incorrect I was. How there are so many things I’ve seen since then that made me pause and say: Thank God I am here to see this. Like the Grand Canyon. Or the way the waves hit the walls of the fort in Galle. Or how beautiful his mother looked on that night we had to walk home in the blizzard, and since there were no cars we simply wandered down the middle of the streets in Brooklyn, and how even though we were freezing we laughed the whole time.”